So.
My grandfather, whom I call daddy because my grandparents raised me, has colon cancer. That would suck enough, if it wasn’t for the fact that he’s been fighting prostate cancer since I was 17. He starts chemotherapy in a few weeks, and then he’ll have surgery.
My mom is in jail. She’s probably going to prison. For a long time. Hopefully not, but most likely so. She’s been in for a couple of weeks now, and no bond has been set.
My grandfather built the house that my grandparents raised me in with his own bare hands. My grandmother dreamed of this house and he built it. Total love story, I know. They are now close to losing it. His medical bills are piling up, and the only income is from my grandmother, which is minimal. Right now, I have no idea how they’re staying afloat. I don’t know how much longer they can.
This house that they’ve had for 20+ years. This house that I’ve always called home, even after marriage and children. This house that I was happy to come back to every time J. and I split. This house that they saved for and built without taking out loans, that they had to take money out against just a few years ago because they were scammed by a horrible criminal that nearly took them for all they had, and would have taken the house too had they not financed it.
The idea of them losing this house, this physical manifestation of their love and hard work and everything they’ve accomplished in life, after all these years. When they’re approaching the end of their lives…it really hurts me. I wish I could help, but I can’t. They say the Lord will pull them through it. I say nothing, but I hope something does.
The idea of seeing my grandfather, a pillar of quiet strength weakened and sickly, the idea of my grandmother having to live with out him…it’s too much to think about, so I try not to.
The idea of my mom going to prison, leaving my sister to be raised by her father, giving my grandparents something else to worry about, not being able to see her grandchildren grow up or maybe accept my brother’s sexuality and mend fences with him…ugh.
It’s ridiculous around these parts.
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Listening to: Joe Turner & Pete Johnson – Roll ‘Em Pete
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I am sorry there are heartbreaking things happening in your family right now.
You are all in my thoughts and I am holding you in my heart.
fuck, babe.
I wish there was something I could say to make it different, make it better
I’m sorry. It’s a good thing your girls have you to guide them through all this.
I really wish I had something to say, but I can’t think of anything. Let me know if there is anything that can be done to help. A phone call, something.
Man, we are going to be a FUN pair at BlogHer. I say many, MANY martinis and shots will be in order. I was scraping the barrel myself today for things to be happy about. But cancer is the ultimate suck thing. I’m so sorry. The house is bad enough, but walls aren’t alive, no matter how much it hurts to lose them. Hoping for your whole family, hon…
:(
I’m sorry. Cancer is such the enemy, I don’t even wanna give it the energy by talking about how much hate I have for it for what its done to my own family. It hurts to have experienced and to know that older people sometimes suffer in their later years. Its something I will never understand.
My thoughts are with you and you have my hugs.
I’m so sorry about everything that your family is going through. I’m glad that your grandparents have their faith and I have no doubt that your beautiful girls make everything better for them. (Btw, I’m talking about your daughters, not your breasts).
As for me, my cat took a dump on my bed this week. On my side of the bed.
Shit. I’ so sorry. It’s a crime that people who work hard their whole lives end up in danger of losing everything because of sickness. I’m so, so sorry.
Oh man. Hang in there girl.
FUCK.
I am so sorry. :(
I’m sorry to read about the stuff going on with you and your family.
I am so sorry to hear this. Have they considered a reverse mortgage? It might be something worth looking into.
I hope your grandfather’s surgery goes well, and his treatment is successful.
Fucking SUCKS.
I hope something awesome happens…
xoxo
Oh buddy. My heart goes out to you.
June 20, 2009 at 6:20 pm
I’m so sorry this is happening. *hugs*
I’m sorry to hear about your Grandfather and your Mom. It’s so hard. (Hugs)
I wish for your grandfather the free treatment he would have here in Canada….I can’t imagine losing something due to the price of a medical treatment.
I wish for your mom…strength and good luck.
I wish for acceptance for your brother.
I know you will come out of all of this turmoil, still being you and still strong (maybe a tad bruised, but still strong)
My mom has dementia/alzheimers, still lives with my a-hole father who basically neglects her, I’m there only child of 3 that does anything for them. My brother has blocked my number and my sister is still in her man to man to man cycle that she’s been in for over 30 years.
Honestly, I pray a lot and sit down at the ocean. I don’t know if you have the ocean near you, but I always come away from my time there invigorated and calmer!
Thinking of you and yours.
Damnit. I wish I had the magic powers to make it better for you guys, but alas…I don’t. I’ll definitely keep you and yours in my thoughts, and I wish nothing but the best for all of you. Keep hanging in there.
I’m so sorry. Just one of those things would be a lot to take in. I hope that your parents get some ease and that peace & health come to your family.
And here I am feeling sorry for myself that I have been sick for two weeks with a cold. I think I needed that perspective.
I’m sorry things are so tough around your parts right now. I wish I could help.
Damn Maria. I truly hope that everything works out.
I’m giving you the biggest, longest hug ever when I see you and then I will whisk you away from everyone else for an hour and we’ll go sit on a wharf and just say “fuck” a lot. And maybe smoke.
(If I misspelled whisk, then consider yourself, like, I dunno, an egg or something one would whisk. But in a good way. How’s this comment for non-nonsensical?)
I’m so sorry you’re dealing with all this shit Maria – there is nothing worse than feeling helpless when someone you love is struggling.
I’ll be thinking of you.
I’m so sorry that your family is going through turmoil. It just doesn’t seem fair that your grandparents have did so much for others and are now having so many issues themselves.
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