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Celebrities

and now that I've calmed down a bit.

by Maria on February 11, 2010

in Celebrities, Purging, Televisión y Pelicula

If you know me well, you know that I absolutely, unequivocally, unrepentantly love John Mayer. On many levels, as a person, as a musician, as a celebrity. I’ve been a fan of his for about a decade now, and my love has only grown throughout his career. I’ve never cared about his relationships, I’ve never paid that close of attention to his personal life; I’ve been satisfied looking at his pretty lips, reading articles (from real magazines, not gossip blogs), and listening to his music. If you look at my last.fm, he’s my number one overall everything on every chart. That’s saying quite a bit, because I listen to a lot of music. I honestly thought there’d be nothing he could to that would change my opinion of him, ever. The rest of the world labeled him a douchebag for little media snippets and soundbites, while I appreciated his candidness, the fact that he was willing to open himself up and say off the wall shit, knowing how those that hated him would perceive him. How he didn’t let that stop him from saying what was on his mind. I appreciated that. Until yesterday.

Yesterday, as I’m sure you know, (along with my feelings about it if you follow me on Twitter) an article on Playboy.com was released to the world, and many of his fans, me most definitely included, were shocked to read much of what he said. Things like this:

Someone asked me the other day, “What does it feel like now to have a hood pass?” And by the way, it’s sort of a contradiction in terms, because if you really had a hood pass, you could call it a nigger pass. Why are you pulling a punch and calling it a hood pass if you really have a hood pass? But I said, “I can’t really have a hood pass. I’ve never walked into a restaurant, asked for a table and been told, ‘We’re full.’”

I was just reeling from that. I re-read it a few times, like “did he seriously just say that? seriously?” Now I completely understand what he was trying to say. He was attempting to explain that he didn’t really have a hood pass (which is basically when black people love you so much, we almost consider you one of us) he’d be able to say the n-word. And since he can’t say that, he doesn’t really have one. He went on to explain that realizes white privilege but negated that by saying he identifies in a way with the black struggle, on a one-on-one level. He could have made that point without saying that word. He is white, and therefore he is not able to say that word without repercussions. Only black people, and sometimes not even black people, are able to say that word and obviously be devoid of racist intent. Therefore, no one else can say it, in my book. It doesn’t matter the context. You just do not say it. Period.

I don’t think I open myself to it. My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.

It’s no secret that I’ve said if given the opportunity, I’d make sweet, sweet groupie love to John Mayer. Something about him just does it for me. I think he’s gorgeous. But it didn’t bother me that he said he’s not physically attracted to women of color. I completely understand preferences, there are plenty of people that aren’t attracted to members of an opposite race. It was the way he said it. Comparing your dick to David Duke? Ugh. And he didn’t stop there, he went on to talk about the black women he does find attractive, managing to be even more offensive to women as a whole:

I always thought Holly Robinson Peete was gorgeous. Every white dude loved Hilary from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And Kerry Washington. She’s superhot, and she’s also white-girl crazy. Kerry Washington would break your heart like a white girl. Just all of a sudden she’d be like, “Yeah, I sucked his dick. Whatever.” And you’d be like, “What? We weren’t talking about that.” That’s what “Heartbreak Warfare” is all about, when a girl uses jealousy as a tactic.

What the hell is white girl crazy?

I went deeper into the interview, but when he talked about Jessica Simpson as if all she were to him were a great piece of ass he enjoyed pounding, and then stopped himself short, not out of a realization he may offend her, but out of a respect for Jennifer Aniston, I couldn’t stomach anymore. I’m glad, because I was informed later that he went on to say more offensive things. To the point where I would believe him if he later claims to have been drunk or cracked out or something while giving the interview.

Yesterday, I was livid. I was hurt and disappointed and livid. I deleted everything scheduled to publish on Fuck Yeah! John Mayer, posted a snippet of the interview and left it at that. I was seriously tempted to delete the entire site but I realize how trigger happy I am, and how rash I can be, so I held off. I attempted to figure out what the hell I was going to do with my tickets to his show on March 15th, something I’ve been seriously looking forward to, for months. I wasn’t sure if I could go, if I could stomach listening to him trying to be clever and entertaining when I no longer felt him to be for that long, in person. Not only that, but much of the fun of going was being able to lust after him in person, and reading that article yesterday, immediately when I read that he said the n-word, all of that dissipated. As I went further into the interview, I was almost sad that I’d ever thought of him that way. My loins no longer ache at the thought of him, and his penis can continue on being a white supremacist.

As the day went on, I read his apology on Twitter and I believe it was genuine; he sounded completely defeated in those few lines, but he only apologized for the use of that word. He didn’t apologize for the misogyny, for the homophobic slurs, for the other offensive quotes. He should have apologized for the interview as a whole.

I talked to a friend about it, in depth, a fellow John Mayer fan and woman of color. Neither us believe John Mayer is a racist. He’s not a racist. He just really lacks that brain to mouth filter that most people have developed I believe he’s become so jaded with how he perceives himself in the media, that he says crazy things to deflect how fragile his ego probably really is and to prevent an interviewer, a paparazzo, a twitter follower, whomever, from being able to get under his skin before he can get under it himself. I do not know him of course, but this is just what I’ve felt. We both decided that we would sit and wait, we would watch closely what he did between now and forever to make this right, what he’d say, how he’d act. We’d hold off on our boycott of him completely, tossing out his music and everything else to do with him for a little while. I thought about how angry I was at Michael Vick – how angry I still am – but reading his apology after he was released made me realize that it was alright to let him continue on with his life and make something positive come out of this. I thought about how I’d easily forgiven Chris Brown for the physical damage he did to Rihanna. Those things were so much worse than this – this was a mistake of much lesser proportions.

This morning in my email I had a link to John Mayer’s apology last night at his Nashville show. I watched, and saw that man standing in front of thousands of people, so vulnerable, fighting back his tears  with that nervous tick, pulling on his fingers and attempting to make some sort of amends, I was touched. I’ve maintained the entire time that he didn’t mean to offend, but that it didn’t take away from what he said.

So now, I’m not sure how I feel anymore. A little piece of my heart broke yesterday, the wind was completely taken out of my sails, which may sound silly but I really don’t care. I connected to him through his music and it hurts that he was so callous, almost like it would if these things were said in a blog post written by one of you – my friends. I still don’t know if I’ll be going to that show on March 15th. I thought yesterday that if I could separate his music from his person, like I can Michael Richards from Kramer when I watch Seinfeld reruns, that I could still go. My tickets are non-transferable, non-refundable and I spent much too much money on them, but I don’t think that’s possible. Maybe in between now and then, as my head levels, as I stop being angry, I’ll be able to appreciate him as a person again and have no qualms about going. I’m unsure.

All I know is while I’m still perturbed, I’m not as angry today as I was yesterday. I’m taking a breather from him and his music for awhile. Hopefully, I can get around this – never over it – and continue on with my fandom. Time will tell.

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Remember when I called Billy Ray Cyrus a Pimp?

by Maria on February 4, 2010

in Celebrities, General Bitching

And I said that his daughters were his high priced hookers? And some people thought I was making a mountain out of a molehill?

Well HE’S NOTHING BUT A PIMP.

Yeah, you can explain away his allowing his 9 year old daughter to swing around stripper poles and dress in dominatrix boots and fishnets at public events, fine. But can you explain away his decision to allow her to front a ‘children’s lingerie line‘? [Edit: Apparently it's not children's lingerie, it's just tutus. The collection is fronted by Emily Grace, Noah Cyrus' best friend but is advertised by both girls.]

NO YOU CANNOT.

You stand corrected.

You can call me a lot of things, but never a prude. That just wouldn’t make any sense. I am extremely liberal, I believe that sex isn’t something to be shied away from. I have age appropriate conversations with my daughters about all topics, sexuality included. But if something is supposed to be for adults, it should be for adults – if it’s for children, it should be for children. This is why we don’t watch Hannah Montana in this house, even though I’ll let them watch Kill Bill. There is a difference between kid stuff, which they will emulate and admire much more than adult stuff, because my kids know the difference between what’s ok for them and what’s not. Miley Cyrus blurs that line and I won’t have that, so no Hannah Montana (they come as a package deal). Have you seen her outfits and actions on stage at her concerts for LITTLE GIRLS?!

miley cyrus shaking her hot ass ani Remember when I called Billy Ray Cyrus a Pimp?
miley cyrus hot legs on stage short Remember when I called Billy Ray Cyrus a Pimp?
miley cyrus hot legs and tight shor Remember when I called Billy Ray Cyrus a Pimp?
Remember when I called Billy Ray Cyrus a Pimp?

Yeah, no. Not in my damn house.

Billy Ray Cyrus is a pimp. There is no excuse for little girls acting like that right under his nose. And all those business and publicity decisions are supposed to go right through him, so there’s no excuse: he’s selling their souls sexuality for money and fame. That’s disgusting.

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And here's why you should shut up about Tiger Woods…

by Maria on December 10, 2009

in Celebrities, General Bitching

All of the news I’ve gotten about this entire debacle has been via Twitter and good Lord EVERYONE has had something to say about it. Which is cool, whatever, but some of what I’ve seen has really annoyed me.

He’s cheated on his wife. With a lot of women, apparently. Okay. That is awful of him, assuming that his marriage was a happy one and he’s just an insatiable horn dog. He decided that the hot piece of ass he married wasn’t enough hot ass. Bad, bad Tiger. Honestly though? You guys don’t know what happened. Their relationship is private, and you don’t know what their marriage has been like. Just like when they were first married and everyone made that grand assumption that because she was a nanny she’d hit the jackpot and married him for his money. You have absolutely no idea. About anything going on their life, besides what TMZ says. I mean of course we will all form opinions on it, and he should have been prepared for that, because he’s in the public eye – it’s what happens when you’re famous and rich – but it’s the finality of everyone’s opinions that bugs me. She should leave him, he should lose his endorsement deals, he’s a dog, she’s a saint, I hope he burns in hell and she takes all of his money – those sorts of things. Wow, I could have sworn that we’ve all made mistakes, we’ve all placed ourselves in situations that would make another person’s stomach turn. You wouldn’t think that by looking at some of the tweets I’ve seen.

BUT WHAT REALLY PISSES MY FUCKING GUTS are those that are laughing at what Elin Woods did, but if it was reversed would be boycotting golf itself until Tiger was banned. Those  same people that are counting off his women and wondering if he has an STD.  Or saying “whoa, that’s awesome of his wife,! I would have done the same thing! If my husband had cheated on me I would have gone after him with golf clubs too! I love it! Don’t lay down and take that, girl!” You are all some ridiculous fucking hypocrites. Seriously, so, like I don’t understand you AT ALL.

What if the situation had been reversed and Elin had cheated on Tiger, and then Tiger chased her out of their house, beating her with golf clubs, beating her car as she tried to escape him, even half passed out of pain pills for an injury, causing her to crash? Or what if he’d gotten out of his car after the crash to defend himself and hit her? With his fists or the golf club or a tree branch or a puppy or whatever? I doubt if ANY of you that are making light of what she did would be on his side.

Let’s put this in comparison with another high profile domestic incident of this year: Chris Brown and Rihanna. Chris Brown was boycotted, he was determined to be unworthy of any adulation, he was shunned by everyone, everywhere. He was a monster, a villain, there was no possible excuse for what he did, there was no reason, and even now many feel that there is no coming back from what he did. That he should lose it all.

Do you see the problem with that? I do. It was my issue all along. Now, if you keep up with black gossip sites, which most of you probably don’t, you’ll know that Chris Brown and Rihanna were rumored to have a really volatile relationship – before he whooped her ass. It was noted that she had jumped on him before, unable to control her temper, during public events, to which Chris responded by trying to escape or pushing her away from him. Which is why it never sat well with me that she never did anything at all to provoke his attack back in February, whether it was giving him herpes or hitting him first or whatever. I thought it must have been something, but that’s speculation on my part, just as it is everyone else’s. None of that mattered though: once it was revealed that he hit her, he was fucking lynched.

Why isn’t the same thing happening to Elin Woods? Why is no one saying SHE’S a monster? I mean, there’s something hilariously ironic about her going after the most famous golf player in the world with golf clubs, but other than that? There’s nothing funny about this. Can I see myself doing exactly what she did in that situation? OF COURSE. If you’ve been reading me for a while, you’ll know that I’ve done the same (fists not golf clubs) for a lot less reason. But do I think I deserved preferential treatment because I don’t have a dick or because I felt that I had good reason? NO.

If violence is always wrong, if it’s never justified, that should remain true no matter if it’s a woman scorned or just a guy with a temper doing the assaulting. You need to decide how you feel about domestic violence and fucking stick with it.

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Different thoughts on the Polanski debacle.

by Maria on October 12, 2009

in Celebrities

So, Roman Polanksi raped someone.

Let’s not get into the fact that she was 13. Or that she had a rabid stage mother. Or that she looked older than she was. Or that now she wants him to be left alone. Let’s not bother discussing that he dealt with Nazis and murderous cults in the past. Or that the presiding judge was press hungry, or that Roman Polanksi is an old man now. All of those things are beside the fact, and none of them negate the bottom line that people keep trying to circumvent with minuscule details: Roman Polanksi raped someone.

She said no, repeatedly, while he raped her. While he orally, vaginally and anally raped her, after drugging her. It doesn’t matter that she was a child and he was in his 40’s – if she had been in her 40’s as well it still would have been rape.

So we can agree that he’s a rapist, yes? I mean if you don’t agree (WHOOPIE GOLDBERG) I don’t know what to tell you. Even Roman Polanksi himself agrees with me. He did plead guilty to it, you know. Anyway, I’ll continue on, assuming that you agree with me -

my question is this: Why are people petitioning for his release? Saying he paid his penance? Why are some of these people people that I greatly admire like Michael Mann and Terry Gilliam and Martin Scorsese? I don’t understand. He did something wrong – or for the sake of playing devil’s advocate he might have done something  seriously wrong  -  and he needs to come stand trial and/or pay for his crimes.

Do you know who Victor Salva is?

Victor Salva directed one of my favorite childhood movies, Powder. Oh how I love Powder. It’s not necessarily a good movie, but I love it. It’s great to me. Powder is also a Disney film.

Before directing Powder, Salva directed Clownhouse which was heavily supported by Francis Ford Coppola. Salva raped the 12 year old boy that starred in Clownhouse, and videotaped himself doing so. He plead guilty and spent 15 months in prison for it. When he was released, Coppola financially supported him and Salva (with Coppola’s help) was able to find more work in Hollywood. Work like directing a DISNEY film.

Salva is still making movies, albeit crappy ones, today. The last one I can think of was Jeepers Creepers and that had Justin Long in it, you know the guy from the Mac commercials? Adorable little dark haired guy? He seems like he has a good head on his shoulders. I’d like to know if anyone ever asked him how he felt about working with Salva, knowing Salva’s past transgressions much like I wonder if anyone asked Adrien Brody about working with Roman Polanski on The Pianist, knowing Polanksi’s past.

But there is a difference between Salva and Polanksi: Salva paid his debt to society.

Now, our justice system is fundamentally flawed, I know this. When people get more prison time for smoking pot than for raping little boys, something’s SERIOUSLY wrong. But, that was what he was given, and that’s what he served. I want to believe in the rehabilitation system, that when someone is given a sentence and it’s carried out that they should be able to carry on with their lives. If I don’t believe in it, if we don’t, what’s the point in having it? As fucked up as it is, we have to rely on it. If we’re going to continue punishing someone for what they have already been punished for, why release them at all? We’d might as well give everyone who’s been convicted of a crime a life sentence.

I could see Justin Long and Francis Ford Coppola saying that Salva paid his debt to society and should be able to continue on in the world. I would 100% agree with them, because that would be right. No matter if it turns my gut, no matter if I feel it should have been 15 years, not months served for it. No matter if I personally couldn’t see myself working with/for someone that could do something so disgusting and heinous. He served his time.

I cannot however see how Adrien Brody and Martin Scorsese and Woody Allen can support Polanksi. (I know many people try to compare Polanksi and Allen but I’m sorry, they are not the same: Allen’s now wife was 22 years old and he was not legally nor biologically her father and as drastic as the age difference may seem to us, he did nothing wrong as far as we know and being as they’ve been together for almost 20 years now – they’re obviously doing something RIGHT) I don’t see why Whoopie Goldberg is willing to go onto a popular talk show  geared towards women and basically undermine all the progress we’ve made to ensure  that rape victims feel safe and secure in reporting their attacks by attempting to differentiate between rape and  ‘rape-rape‘. Especially when she herself is the face of strong rape survivors to many women because of her role in the film The Color Purple, where her character was an inspiration to me and countless others.

Roman Polanksi has not paid for his crimes. He’s lived the last 30+ years of his life in luxury and leisure. His age today doesn’t matter. If Charles Manson or the Auschwitz Nazis that made his life so awful had eluded capture up until now and then been caught, would Roman Polanksi and his celebrity friends be saying that they’d paid for their crimes simply by growing old on the run?

I don’t think so.

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Innocent until proven guilty.

by Maria on June 30, 2009

in Celebrities

Some people are not mourning Michael Jackson. Fine. I don’t care.

Some of those same people are criticizing others’ mourning him by screaming that he was a child molester. That, I do care about.

I would like to reiterate that he was not a child molester.

He was found innocent, remember? There was never any proof, remember? And many, many people have had their lives destroyed by false accusations from children, at the behest of money hungry parents, over zealous social workers and authority abusing police detectives. Or sometimes because the kids themselves are just liars.

I don’t need to give you examples, do I? You’ve got Google.

Let me ask you this: if your son came to you and told you that a man molested him, would you accept that man’s substantial amount of hush money and disappear or would you want to see him burn – either at your hands or at those of a jury? I’d like to inform you that if you chose the previous, you are shitty parent, although I suspect you knew that already.

I do not believe that boy was a victim of Michael Jackson. I believe he was the victim of his money hungry father (remember, the mother always said Jackson was innocent). I believe the second little boy was full of shit too. Maybe his parents were hip to the ‘let him be strung up and found guilty and then will sue him for everything he has in civil suit’ method? Who knows.

I believe they killed him. Or we did. Either his addiction to those drugs he began taking to deal with the pain and stress of those accusations, or his desire to have the public that he spent his entire life pleasing love him again – one of those things killed him, that’s pretty clear.

I think that Michael Jackson was a lonely man. One that was a victim of severe abuse and one that wanted nothing more than to have a normal life, to recreate a childhood that he always dreamed of. I believe that he used his money to try to relive his existence, make one of his own. I believe that the emotional and physical abuse he suffered damaged him and his decision making abilities. If we were to round up and shoot all the people that did dumb shit in the world, we’d all be in line for that execution, yes?

Does no one ever stop to consider why he shielded his children so adamantly? Maybe because he didn’t want them to grow up the way he did. He didn’t want the piranhas and vultures of media and society ripping them apart like they did him. Maybe he was determined to give them a real childhood, one that he never had, so that they wouldn’t end up twisted and confused like he did.

I understand why some people think he was guilty, I do. All I’m saying is for me personally, I don’t take accusations like that lightly, and I am not willing to say that he did anything like that, with the little bit of knowledge we have about the situation, paired with my own ability to use my common sense and reasoning skills.

I believe that he was innocent.

Maybe he wasn’t – I don’t know, just like you don’t. We can sit around and debate all the ‘facts’ all we want to. He’s dead, and I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt. We don’t know shit about that man. We never did. We knew what we saw. We knew what we were told. We knew what many mocked and ridiculed. We knew what he gave us, what we took from him.

I will mourn Michael Jackson without any qualms or hesitation. I will remember him as a man that changed music. That changed history. As a great musician and humanitarian. As a good heart, as someone who brought joy to millions of people, all over the world. I will remember and mourn him as just Michael Jackson. Because he was innocent: never proven guilty. Because I believe that he never hurt a child. Because he himself was a victim, of his father, of his life, of himself, and of us.

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