French women don’t like me. Nor do French- Canadians. Seriously, I’m not making it up. We went to the park yesterday. It was much too beautiful a day to be wasted indoors. The girls love to swing more than anything else, so that’s where an entire hour of our time was spent. Occupying the swing between The Bella and Goobie was a small girl being pushed by her mother, a blonde about my height and fifty pounds lighter [READ: skinny bitch] who spoke to her in French. I listened intently because I have an obsession with foreign languages as spoken by the natives. It was beautiful, except for those words that called for a decent amount of spit to be gathered in the back of the throat- when she spoke those the wind seemed to be determined to make sure her saliva ended up in my eyes.
They left to run around the rest of the play- ground and eventually she returned carrying her daughter on her hip and followed by another blonde skinny bitch woman and another small child. As they began to push their daughters beside where I still pushed Goobie they started to have a very animated conversation in French. I decided to push Goobie from the front to avoid the impending double spit attack.
Now I don’t know what they were saying but I know it was about me. I just know it. I mean I swear I could see them blowing their cheeks out and stomping around to imitate my substantial girth and point and giggling at me out of the corner of my eye. No, I’m not being paranoid – they did! I just can’t prove it is all…
{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
How rude! If they’re going to bust on you the least they could do is speak English so you could fire back!!!
yeah…i agree with caffeine court…if you’re going to insult someone…do it so they can understand you…otherwise, what’s the fun…er…point?
i’m sure, when i go into vietnamese nail salons, they are making fun of my gnarly toes…sure of it! but, like you…i can’t prove it!
xoxo
But it sounds so pretty when done in French… Except of course, those words that involve spit. Too funny!
@caffeine court – I can’t spell caffeine right to save my life. But yeah! They were punks! :P
@suchsimplepleasures – Exactly! They really need to man up. *lol*
Rude people = ugly, empty soul people. end of story. no matter how skinny or pretty they appear to be on the outside.
Don’t take it personally, hun. French women don’t LIKE anyone. I’ll come over and we can bust their asses in Spanish.
Ha! You’re f-u-n-n-y! And you’ve got quite the lil cutie pie there.
Thanks for visiting Huckdoll, you rock.
Looking forward to reading more.
~ Huckdoll
Okay, I was totally going to say the exact same thing as suchsimplepleasures, but as usual, she beat me to it. I’ll get back at you, Melissa!!!!
Anyway, great post, and really fun blog. I’m glad I stopped by!!
just found your blog and think it’s great. i’ll be back!
I’m French-Canadian. You don’t seem too bad.
Must be because I’m not a skinny bitch.
lol
@kimmylynn – I’d take an empty soul over this dress size any day. *LMAO*
@leendalu ~ ¡Podríamos sí!
@ Roxy – Your comment disappeared! I don’t know if I accidentally deleted it or you decided I suck and you did but it’d gone!
Wwwaaaahhh!!!
@Karen – Melissa’s a thought thief, eh?! *lol*
@zoloftmom – Thanks! I’m off to explore your section of the blogosphere.
I agree with Leendaluu. French people in general don’t like anyone. That’s why they don’t bathe. Keeps the riff raff away.
Ma always said purty is as purty does.
It’s true, period.
Thanks for stopping by earlier. I’m actually quite glad you found me. You have a great way of explaining things. Really!
They were just jealous. Seriously! Small-minded and weak. Poor things. Think of how intimidating you were! All female . . . and . . . and . . . um . . . pushing your kid on the swingset. Terrifying! They simply had to strike back. You forced them to it.
What were they, 12 years old?
HAHA I swear the asian women talk about me when I get a pedicure. I just KNOW they do. LOL
The latest from Tiffany…Freckles SUCK