Immoral Matriarch: Catechizer

Exegesis

This is probably the best place for you to start. I mean, you need to know what you’re getting into, right? I am extremely opinionated but I maintain an overall civil and diplomatic demeanor in my every day interactions. This blog is my personal space to say whatever the fuck I want. I do not and will not apologize or even attempt to justify anything written here. If you don’t like something I say and can’t get past it, that’s too bad. I don’t expect you to agree with me, and I don’t care if you do; I only request that you respect my opinions because I will always respect yours.

If you have something to say that you’d rather not share publicly, in the navigation bar to your right there is a link for ‘Contact‘. Via the form you will find there, your comments and questions will go straight to my email, and I can reply to you via yours, if you choose to share your address with me.

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[This is how I operate. I felt it was most relevant and important to you, dear reader, so I stuck @ the top.]

Immoral Matriarch: Catechizer - The name of this blog has nothing to do with me being a mother, as hard as it may be to believe. It’s actually an homage to my real name, Maria Del Rosario, which translates into ‘Mary of the Rosary’. I was named for the Virgin Mary, the holy mother. Do I live up to her name? Nope. I’m the opposite really, so that’s why I’m immoralmatriarch. Simple as that. Oh, catechizer? That’s basically someone who teaches religious doctrine. I consider this blog to be a doctrine of my life, and I’m teaching it to each of you.

Protected Posts - I removed the passwords from any previously protected posts. Some posts may be protected in the future, but I doubt it. If there are, there will be a password request form made available.

Blogrolling - I deleted my blogroll. If you’d like me to suggest some good reads, email me or use the contact form. Other than that, there’s really no reason to have one, in my opinion. That’s what Google Reader is for.

Commenting - If I comment on your blog, it’s because I want to. I won’t do it otherwise. I do appreciate a return visit though, so if I’m continuously commenting on yours and you never reciprocate, I’ll assume that’s your way of informing me that you’re not interested in what I have to say and would prefer it if I stopped saying anything to you. No offense taken - I’m an acquired taste, you know? I do always return comments unless it’s obvious you only came by for hits [ie. it was obvious you didn't read it] or if I have nothing to say about your content. Usually in the latter though, I’ll keep checking back until I see something I like, or until I give up.

Replying to Comments - I try to reply as soon and as often as I can. Sometimes I’ll do it via email, sometimes on the post page. Sometimes both. I love you for taking the time to say something. :)

Anonymous - I allow anonymous comments, and I never delete anything won’t delete anything but spam, but I prefer that if you aren’t some troll/stalker/hater type that you leave your name in your comment. Just makes the comment more personable. Your choice though.

[The folks I write about. ]

Me - I’ve already introduced myself here, but since you’re already reading this - I’ll do a summary. I’m María. I’m 24, I live in North Carolina and I’m a college student with no decided major or goal. I’m also on hiatus until the spring because I missed fall registration [DAMNITT!]. I like dogs, the color black and big words. I curse a lot. I’m an Atheist, I think Stephen Hillenburg is a genius and for later reference, the type of music I’m listening to is always an indicator of the mood I’m in. I’m 71 lbs overweight, diabetic and still angry over the cancellations of Judging Amy & Journeyman.

Goobie - My 3 year old. No, that’s not her real name: I don’t smoke crack. That is her most frequently used nickname though, the other being ‘Ari’. Her real name is Rosarío [Rose-Auuurrr-E-Oh]. She enjoys singing The Beatles’ songs, watching The Blues Brothers and snuggling. She torments her sister free of charge and puts yogurt and nail polish in her own hair just to give me things to do when I’m not bored. I think she looks like me, but no one ever tells me she does so I’m probably wrong. She is my baby. I had a tubal ligation, so she is my last. I am purposefully stunting her social development so that she won’t grow up too fast. So far, it’s not working at all - she’s the most independent kid I know.

The Bella - My oldest, my 5 year old, Isabella - the sweetest child you will ever meet. Bella is her nickname as well, but it’s so common that we’ve decided to establish her as The Original Bella. Well, she established herself and we caught on. She is perfectly imperfect due to suffering a birth injury which caused her to have a condition called Erb’s Palsy. It permanently impaired the functioning of her left arm, but thanks to weekly physical and occupational therapies since she was 2 months old she has recovered greatly and it’s hardly noticeable. You’ll only see me bring that up on my dreariest, darkest, most self loathing days. I prefer not to think about it. She has my dimples and curly hair and her father’s porcelain skin and chubby cheeks. She has an evident talent for art, a perpetually whining voice that I abhor and she loves shoes.

J. - My probably-soon-to-be-ex-husband. His name’s Jason. [Read: Don't tell him I told you that.] I have been with him for a little longer than 6 years. I love him, and I believe he loves me. But I’m a 2 & a 4 and he’s an 8. We don’t mesh well. He hates my blog, and always has. You won’t see his face here. You won’t see him mentioned much here either since I respect his privacy, as long as he respects that if I want to blog about ‘us’ I will because I am was a part of ‘us’ and it’s my blog. Damnitt.

(I am a liberal independent.)

Religion - I am an Agnostic Atheist with Apatheist leanings. I do not know if God exists, lean more towards God being your imaginary friend, and I don’t really care if God exists. In any form. If he does, I have accepted that I will burn in hell for my wicked ways. Gladly, actually, because I would never ’serve’ any being like that. God is a fucktard. Sorry to offend [not really] but tell how good he is to the people in Darfur right about now.

Abortion - I am pro-choice, but I believe abortion is murder. I think that no one has the right to tell a woman what she can or cannot do in regards to her body, and if that child cannot survive without being a part of her - it is her decision alone. I also believe that there are enough unwanted children in the world: we don’t need any more. But, a zygote is a baby is an embryo is a baby is a fetus is a baby is a baby is a baby. Case in point:

[6 week old miscarried fetus. Img via the nutcases @ jillstanek.com]

Capital Punishment - I am 150% against it. “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind…”

War - Not my War. I think George W. Bush took advantage of our vulnerability as a nation post 9/11 and led us into a war we should never have been in under the guise of counter-terrorism efforts. I don’t believe we should have invaded Iraq, and that he just wanted to prove to daddy that he could take down the Hussein regime. I believe that we should pull out immediately. I was for phasing out over a period of time previously, but I don’t see the point in that anymore.

Gay Marriage - All for it. I really don’t understand how anyone could be against it. Well, I do - from a religious standpoint, but I don’t understand why anyone would think their religious restrictions should apply to the rest of the world.

Marijuana - I’m for decriminalizing marijuana. I have yet to see a valid reasoning behind its illegality. Especially since tobacco and alcohol are much worse, and everyone who’s done a bit of research knows it. Legalize it, tax it, and place an age limit on it.

Border Security - Should be enforced, but those already here [if there is no criminal activity in their past] should be able to work towards citizenship. Immigration should be better handled and controlled. I also believe children of illegal immigrants should be eligible for financial aid and scholarships. They are here through no fault of their own - why punish them?

Global Warming - It exists and it caused by greenhouse gasses. ‘Nuff said, I think.

Trade - I am for fair trade. I believe that free trade is detrimental to the economies of lesser countries and that it isn’t fair for us to take advantage of our capitalistic superiority.

Healthcare - I believe in Universal Healthcare. But not mandatory healthcare.

Gun Control - I support banning semi-automatic weapons and intensifying the licensing process of obtaining one.

Prayer in Schools - Vehemently against it.

Stem Cell Research - Absolutely for it.

The N-Word - I don’t say it. I used to, but I chose to stop, only because it’s not a word I want my children to hear, other than in music, literature, or movies where it may be able to foster a necessary discussion. That being said, I think that white people who have a problem with black people saying it need to shut up. Why the fuck do you care? And if you’re using that twisted logic of ‘if they can say it, I should be able to say it too!’ then back far away from me. You really shouldn’t even be concerning yourself with this argument, and should have no interest in the word. You know, only black people can say it and be completely void of malicious or racist intent. Unless you’re Uncle Ruckus. It’s just the truth.

[This is just how *I* feel, and how I raise my own. I really don't give a shit what you do with your kids.]

Lactivist - A parent who believes in breastfeeding and child led weaning, the opposite of each only in extreme circumstances, those circumstances to be determined by each individual parent.

Immunivist - A parent who is against vaccinating in regards to their own children. Like me. I believe that the link to autism and various other diseases and vaccinating is real. But do what you please with your own, and if you want to debate about the pro’s and con’s of immunizing, go to Mothering.com[munists]. I’m not up for it.

Intactivist - A parent against routine infant circumcision. Like me. It’s mutilation by definition:

mu·ti·late [myoot-l-eyt] -verb (used with object), -lat·ed, -lat·ing.

Again, if you want to debate, look elsewhere. My beliefs are my own.

Re: Spanking - No. I used to pop hands and bottoms, but don’t even do that anymore. There is a difference between instilling fear and teaches boundaries and respect. I realized that around the time my second was born. I still threaten like a mutha fucker, but it gets me no where. They call my bluff. *shrugs* Also, there are some bad ass kids out there, and some of those little bastards need to be beaten so do what you gotta do mommies. Beat ‘em. No, I’m kidding. Mostly. Kind of. Not really.

Wha’? - ‘What’ in a more exaggerated form. Picture me with bugged out eyes and my jaw on the floor in complete amazement.

Friggin’ - Freakin’ usually, because when I want to say fucking I usually do.

Seriously - I sometimes say that just to make sure you know how serious I am when I’m being extremely serious. Seriously.

I’m just sayin’… - I like to think of it as my catch phrase but too many other people use it. Infringing bastards.

‘The fuck? - As in ‘What the fuck?’ but I’m so dismayed by whatever I’m referring to that I can’t even get out the complete sentence.