Immoral Parenting: Heaven & Hell

by Maria on December 2, 2008

in Mothering, The Bella

After watching All Dogs Go To Heaven:

Bella: Mommy, are we going to heaven when we die too?

Me: No, you’re going in the ground.

Bella: So only dogs get to go?

Me: Well, some people believe that heaven is a place you go to after you die. But, even if you do, you go in the ground first, unless they burn you up and sprinkle you somewhere, or keep you in a box. And dogs don’t really go to heaven.

Bella: Why not?

Me: Well, heaven is not really a place for us as we are – it’s for something that some people think is inside of us, called our souls. Something that people think is the most important part of us. Animals don’t have those.They don’t have the kind that gets to go to heaven, at least.

Bella: But why do people think when you die you go to heaven?

Me: Some people, like grandma and papa think that there is someone up in the sky called God. And if we do everything that God wants us to do, when we die, or if he comes back to Earth before we die, he’ll take us up to live with him, and he lives in heaven, for 1000 years or something like that, and then we’ll come back to Earth to live for eternity after God kills everyone that didn’t do what he told them to do. But, if you’re dead, you stay dead, and your soul sleeps until he brings you back from the dead.

Bella: Like Smitty Wednesdaybum on Spongebob?

Me: Kinda.

Bella: Well that’s just craaaaaaaaaaazzzzzzzyyyyyyyyy!

Me: Heh. Some people don’t think so.

Bella: Do you think so?

Me: I don’t know if I think it’s crazy. I think it’s probably not true. But I used to think it was.

Bella: Why did you used to?

Me: Because that’s what Grandma and Papa told me. And the people at church told me. And they were grownups, and I thought they were right.

Bella: Well I think zombies living in the sky is craazzzyyyy!

Me: Well, don’t tell Grandma and Papa that.

Bella: Why?

Me: That’d be rude.

Bella: But can I tell Goobie?

Me: Sure.

Bella: Mommy, mommy? Why does God kill people that don’t listen?

Me: As punishment. He tortures and burns them first.

Bella: With fire??!!

Me: Yes. A special fire that lasts a very long time.

Bella: Well, when I don’t listen, I get time out. You wouldn’t kill me! Would you?

Me: Of course not.

Bella: Well, I don’t think that’s a good way to punish people. That’s really mean.

Me: I think so too, love.

Bella: So why do people want to be dead and live with somebody that’s so mean?

Me: I dunno. But, you have to remember that not everyone wants that. Some people think we come back to life as different things like animals or other people. But it doesn’t matter to me. I don’t think God is real.

Bella: Me neither. I think he’s like the fairy Nejla told me would go under my pillow and get my teeth when they fall out when I get big. That’s not real. Me neither.

Me: I think you’re right. But, no one really knows. I guess we won’t know for sure until we die.

Bella: No. Not until we die.

And with that, she ran off to play.

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{ 41 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Temple December 2, 2008 at 12:36 am

*sigh*

PS. I’m sorry about your key cover. Hee.

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2 Natalie December 2, 2008 at 1:00 am

This is a subject I struggle with, as someone who doesn’t believe…

and with that, I’ll shut up, because I had a long tangent written here that I’m not sure is appropriate to the entry.

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3 Tara R. December 2, 2008 at 1:10 am

Well… when you put it that way it all makes sense. “Well I think zombies living in the sky is craazzzyyyy!” :D

I’m still undecided about a lot of things in this discussion with myself. Your kids are probably going to be so much more grounded than kids from my generation.

Tara R.´s last blog post..Holiday Cookie Exchange

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4 mothergoosemouse December 2, 2008 at 1:12 am

Sounds a lot like our discussions.

mothergoosemouse´s last blog post..Yes we can…what?

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5 Maria
@maria0305
December 2, 2008 at 1:14 am

@Tara R.:

My main struggle with talking to Bella about God/Heaven & Hell/whatever is trying to make sure I don’t convince her of anything, either way. I want her and her sister to be able to make their own decisions on this subject, and also be respectful of differing opinions on it. It’s hard, but I’m trying. Although sometimes, when she says things like what you quoted? I’m like ‘well, maybe you’re gonna do ok kid.’ *lol*

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6 Zoeyjane
@Zoeyjane
December 2, 2008 at 4:57 am

But it’s good that you’re willing to talk about it in the first place, having your own concepts already wired into place. I want to leave Isobel her own thoughts and beliefs, her father wants to raise a hard-core aetheist – it’s a tough situation, to think of having this or a similar conversation with her, knowing it might just be easier to avoid the whole subject.

Zoeyjane´s last blog post..On Being Part of the Solution

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7 C.J. December 2, 2008 at 5:18 am

Straight from the mouth of babes.

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8 Carolyn Online December 2, 2008 at 7:54 am
9 OHmommy
@OHmommy
December 2, 2008 at 8:50 am

Luckily, we have not had the conversation. I don’t know what I wold have said.

OHmommy´s last blog post..Perhaps we can call it Christmas spirit?

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10 Miss Britt December 2, 2008 at 9:40 am

That’s such a hard line to walk – not wanting to push your own beliefs onto your child, but having to answer their questions. I think it’s inevitable (as is shown here) that our own ideas will color the conversations a little bit.

BUT, I also think it’s inevitable that the idea of openness, tolerance, and free thinking will make an impression as well.

Miss Britt´s last blog post..How Twilight Changed My Life

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11 Miss Grace December 2, 2008 at 11:51 am

I don’t know if I could be as neutral about the possibility of god as you are…

Miss Grace´s last blog post..The version of Saturday that features words

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12 kaila December 2, 2008 at 11:55 am

I wish I was able to explain things to my son like you do with Bella. We recently lost a cat and he saw him being buried. The next day he told me he had a dream about the cat coming out of the dirt – and then a few days later asked if cats can breathe in dirt.
I really did not explain these things to him as eloquently as you do. I was at a loss.

Can you come over?

kaila´s last blog post..Scary Mice with Shitty Pizza – part deux

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13 Xbox4NappyRash December 2, 2008 at 1:11 pm

I have to say I wouldn’t know where to go on this conversation

Xbox4NappyRash´s last blog post..Making that list, checking it twice

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14 Summer December 2, 2008 at 2:28 pm

“Well I think zombies living in the sky is craazzzyyyy!”

That’s the most accurate things anyone could say about Heaven. LOL Love it!

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15 Kristie December 2, 2008 at 3:21 pm

OMG (pun intended)! This was funny.

Kristie´s last blog post..A good day, but it’ll be better after this.

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16 Ashley December 2, 2008 at 4:24 pm

While I don’t necessarily believe what you believe on the God/Heaven thing, I think it’s GREAT that you explain different ideas and aren’t trying to force her in any one direction. All the while, keeping it serious and yet on a level she understands. Great job, I hope I do this good with the more serious types of talks – but right now i’m happy with trying to convince Lorelei to bring me back the diaper wipes she just emptied from the box…

Ashley´s last blog post..Homemade Christmas Gifts

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17 thedemigod December 2, 2008 at 6:01 pm

Hi Maria!

On a totally unrelated stream of thought: I passed on an award to you. All the sordid details are in my blog. :)

Hugs!
Burn

thedemigod´s last blog post..Fabulous

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18 Meli December 2, 2008 at 9:07 pm

You handled that pretty well. When my niece asks me about God and whatever I usually change the topic because I don’t know what to say.

Meli´s last blog post..The secret world of doodles and pom pom’s

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19 merlotmom December 2, 2008 at 10:49 pm

Wow. Not quite casual conversation, huh?
When our dog died and I discussed souls and heaven with my son, he asked me what the soul looked like. I threw the question back at him and he said: “mine looks like a pickle”. And then he went to sleep. Kids are too damn funny.

merlotmom´s last blog post..Not Quite the Griswold’s

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20 April December 3, 2008 at 1:01 am

Nicely done, Maria.

April´s last blog post..Weekend Wrap-Up

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21 the planet of janet December 3, 2008 at 2:30 am

she’s amazing.

the planet of janet´s last blog post..All dressed up and somewhere to go

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22 Rachael December 3, 2008 at 2:58 am

What a great post. I just love your honesty.

Rachael´s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday: I gotta hand it to him…

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23 Kelley December 3, 2008 at 4:30 am

Boo is constantly freaking out his RE teacher (Religious Education) cause his literal mind cannot comprehend the things she is saying. As an agnostic it cracks my shit up.

The other day they did a play. The Nativity scene. Boo was one of the Wise Men. Well that is what he was supposed to be, he spent the whole time running around squealing ‘I am the King of the Jews!!!!!’

Bwaaaaa haaaa haaaaaaaa!

Kelley´s last blog post..My day. Cause I really really couldn’t be bothered thinking up a witty or bizarre title for a post about what I ate for lunch.

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24 TRACI December 3, 2008 at 7:15 am

One of my girlfriends referred to me as a Cafeteria Catholic. I kinda like the term. You pick and choose what sounds right for you. As for my kids, I try to keep it open to them as well. I think the best thing you can do is share your traditions and make sure they know you have an open mind, and they should as well.

TRACI´s last blog post..I Hate It When Wednesday.

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25 rawdawg December 3, 2008 at 10:39 am

thats funny, my three year old is in the why stage? by t5hat i mean she wil ask me a question and follow it up by five whys in a row lol i second that emotion

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