Innocent until proven guilty.
Some people are not mourning Michael Jackson. Fine. I don’t care.
Some of those same people are criticizing others’ mourning him by screaming that he was a child molester. That, I do care about.
I would like to reiterate that he was not a child molester.
He was found innocent, remember? There was never any proof, remember? And many, many people have had their lives destroyed by false accusations from children, at the behest of money hungry parents, over zealous social workers and authority abusing police detectives. Or sometimes because the kids themselves are just liars.
I don’t need to give you examples, do I? You’ve got Google.
Let me ask you this: if your son came to you and told you that a man molested him, would you accept that man’s substantial amount of hush money and disappear or would you want to see him burn – either at your hands or at those of a jury? I’d like to inform you that if you chose the previous, you are shitty parent, although I suspect you knew that already.
I do not believe that boy was a victim of Michael Jackson. I believe he was the victim of his money hungry father (remember, the mother always said Jackson was innocent). I believe the second little boy was full of shit too. Maybe his parents were hip to the ‘let him be strung up and found guilty and then will sue him for everything he has in civil suit’ method? Who knows.
I believe they killed him. Or we did. Either his addiction to those drugs he began taking to deal with the pain and stress of those accusations, or his desire to have the public that he spent his entire life pleasing love him again – one of those things killed him, that’s pretty clear.
I think that Michael Jackson was a lonely man. One that was a victim of severe abuse and one that wanted nothing more than to have a normal life, to recreate a childhood that he always dreamed of. I believe that he used his money to try to relive his existence, make one of his own. I believe that the emotional and physical abuse he suffered damaged him and his decision making abilities. If we were to round up and shoot all the people that did dumb shit in the world, we’d all be in line for that execution, yes?
Does no one ever stop to consider why he shielded his children so adamantly? Maybe because he didn’t want them to grow up the way he did. He didn’t want the piranhas and vultures of media and society ripping them apart like they did him. Maybe he was determined to give them a real childhood, one that he never had, so that they wouldn’t end up twisted and confused like he did.
I understand why some people think he was guilty, I do. All I’m saying is for me personally, I don’t take accusations like that lightly, and I am not willing to say that he did anything like that, with the little bit of knowledge we have about the situation, paired with my own ability to use my common sense and reasoning skills.
I believe that he was innocent.
Maybe he wasn’t – I don’t know, just like you don’t. We can sit around and debate all the ‘facts’ all we want to. He’s dead, and I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt. We don’t know shit about that man. We never did. We knew what we saw. We knew what we were told. We knew what many mocked and ridiculed. We knew what he gave us, what we took from him.
I will mourn Michael Jackson without any qualms or hesitation. I will remember him as a man that changed music. That changed history. As a great musician and humanitarian. As a good heart, as someone who brought joy to millions of people, all over the world. I will remember and mourn him as just Michael Jackson. Because he was innocent: never proven guilty. Because I believe that he never hurt a child. Because he himself was a victim, of his father, of his life, of himself, and of us.
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exactly my thoughts! thank you for putting them in a coherent post.
amen and well said. a piece of history died. regardless of innocence or guilt. he was a brilliant musician. and an incredible artist. a huge loss.
Well written. I understand the dissenters, though. Well-publicized court cases become very symbolic to people. Many, many children (and you are right, Michael was in this group) suffer at the hands or perversities of adults and never see justice because of an imbalance of power, because they never get a chance, or because they aren’t believed. And many wealthy or famous people (think O.J.) aren’t convicted simply because they have power. We don’t know what happened, and while I honor his contributions to music and culture, but I get the conflict others might feel.
Having seen false molestation charges from the perspective of a prosecutor and also a defense attorney, I can say that the allegations never rang true for me. The deviant, evil ones swear they were never in the room. They don’t build amusement parks for them to come visit and hold their hands in public and say they prefer children for friends. Pedophiles are a bit more circumspect in their preying.
I don’t believe it. I am mourning him.
A-Fucking-Men
I’m not 100% sure whether he was innocent or guilty but i fucking love this post. Some of the people who have gone out of their way to stop OTHER folks for choosing to celebrate the positive aspects of MJ’s life need to grow the fuck up.
The bottom line is, MJ dedicated his entire life (LITERALLY) to entertaining the world and giving out shitloads of charity to those who needed it. He did more good in 50 years than I’ll ever do in 5 lifetimes. At the very least he earned the right to be memorialized properly.
Once again, you’ve taken my thoughts and turned them into a beautiful post that I never could’ve written half as well.
Seriously, you’ve got to stop doing that.
It seems like so many Americans don’t even listen to a verdict. Just the accusation makes the person guilty in their mind. But if it was their loved one, the tables would turn.
Fantastic post–I have very mixed feelings about Michael Jackson.
No doubt a musical genius and I find that in mourning him, just like in mourning most celebrities of our childhood, I am really mourning my youth. I mean, it’s not like Michael and I have been spending a lot of time together lately. The fame had really gone to his head.
You’re right–none of us knew him. I have no idea whether he was a child molester or not, but I want to clarify that he was not found innocent, he was found “not guilty” which is different from innocent.
But I agree with you–he has never been convicted of child molestation and people tried really hard to convict him.
Obviously our legal system isn’t perfect, but it’s a little shocking for me how many people are dismissive of it altogether and see his acquittal as a technicality.
I’ve always thought that Michael was a damaged soul, as so many amazing talents are.
Yes! Yes! Yes! This is exactly what I’ve been trying to come up with – but FAR better.
Amazing post!!
I thought he was a freak, really, but who cares? I am not mourning him, am certainly not one of those whack-job fans in Britain who were so prostrate with grief that they killed themselves. After all,I didn’t even know the guy; how can I MOURN him? I think the whole situtation is terribly, terribly sad, though, for all of the reasons you mentioned above. And to be honest, I never really thought much about the child molestation charges; especially now that I have been involved intimately in bringing a true predator to some kind of justice, I don’t think he really did it-because as Laurin says, true predators are NOT open about their relationships with children, at all. And for lots of other reasons. Anyway, a huge chunk of my childhood was spent with MJ, and I am sad about that, and I am sad that his poor kids no longer have their daddy. sad at the way he died, with too many questions. What a great post, Maria!
I am just so sad for the little boy he was, that never got to grow up. I am actually sad for any child in the public eye, to be honest. You cannot be famous and have privacy. And without privacy, how can you be yourself? As far as the charges go, I never followed them, and never knew any information on him. He was, to me, just a very, very sad and lonely person. That is the greatest tragedy of his life.
It’s been really hard for me to reconcile the “old” Michael Jackson to what he became. His existence was like a caricature. I believe he was deeply hurt and abused. All of it is terribly sad, and one of the darkest cautionary tales of fame and fortune.
Poor guy.
On Sunday my parents left on a VH1 thing and we all sat and watched it and reminisced. It’s rare that my parents and my husband and I totally connect on something, but even my super conservative dad couldn’t help admitting how much he’d loved Michael Jackson.
John Lennon died when I was six months old. Now, Michael Jackson has died when my son is six months old. I hope when my Moose is pushing 30 people remember Michael Jackson at the height of his career.
Couldn’t have said it better myself…..agree 100%.
So what did you think of his dad’s press conference? I didn’t watch it, but from what I’ve read it was just publicity for his record album.
I think you’re right- while MJ may have been ‘different’, I think he was innocent. And being weird doesn’t make you a child molestor.
I believe he was a deeply damaged, tragic, abused soul. His life was sad, his end was sad. Looking back, I’m not sure when he was happy. Was he ever happy?
I would never let my son have a sleepover at his house. Does that make him a child molester? Not necessarily. I believe it makes me a watchful parent.
This is the EXACT conversation that I had recently with somebody. And I said that I am not in the business of judging, ESPECIALLY someone who’s gone, and that as a child I loved, loved, LOVED Michael..and this weekend, when they were playing every song he ever sang, I realized that I still do.
I hope the man gets the peace he never had in life.
Beautifully written… so obviously heartfelt.
For me, growing up with his music, knowing what he was and what he became, MJ was in many ways just sad. An indictment of child stardom. I can’t think of one child star who has grown up to be normal, well adjusted. Maybe Ron Howard. Otherwise, they are the train wrecks around us we watch for entertainment value.
Kind of sad. Kind of sad that any parent would wish that on their child.
Perfectly worded.
I in my heart could never believe that he would do anything to harm a child. They were the only ones who saw him as a human being.
beautifully written
I agree completely.
I don’t know what he did with those kids. I hope he didn’t molest them but the relationships were strange. lol I am mourning though. I hate that as a grown man he still wished for that perfect childhood. I am sad because some idiots are still calling him “Wacko Jacko”. I am sad for his parents, his siblings, his children, and friends. No matter what his faults were, I feel the pain of his family & friends and the musical world has just lost another great one. I hope where ever his spirit is, i hope he has peace. Great post honey!
I think he was a sad, sad person, and completely “out there”, for many reasons. I think he had a sad life, but he did a lot of good, too.
I do think he did something with kids, though. Only because years ago, in the 80’s, when the first rumblings came about, there was a story about him to shut those rumblings up, and he took some kid to a toy store. He went to put his arm around that kid and that kid jumped back and gave him the pissiest look ever. The kid who was getting all these great toys from him. Not that it means anything, necessarily, but my mom and I both went “wow”. It was freaky.
Anyway, we’ll never really know, and I don’t mind disagreeing. We can certainly agree that he had a rough life, and that he was a musical genius.
Off the Wall is one of the best albums EVER, IMO.
why am I always the dissenting voice. smh.
I couldn’t disagree with you more. He was not proven guilty and that is not the same as being innocent. I do agree with the poster above who stated that he was a very sad individual. and I think (sometimes unfortunately) that it is difficult for me to see MJ without thinking like a clinician. probably mostly due to the fact that he had a horrible trauma history and appeared to be emotionally stunted by his childhood.
as someone who has worked with both abused children and child molesters, my opinion is that he was likely both. the thing that DOES upset me is that I think that people’s inability to see him as both a magnificent artist and a person who really required serious help impeded……..no made it impossible for him to get help and to lead any sort of normal life. the public is so used to vilifying child molesters that they are unable to see them as people who are damaged and need help. you are choosing to see him as a martyr and that is no more helpful than seeing him as a monster. in reality, he was neither. not that it matters how any of us see him now.
I am mortified however, that they are granting custody to his parents (??!!)……I seriously doubt that that is what he would have wanted, given his accounts of growing up Jackson….I don’t know what would possess a judge to grant custody to them without serious investigation into whether all of the reports of abuse in the Jackson household carried any merit. (I realize that legally the custody is in the hands of Catherine, however Joe has repeatedly made statements that indicate that he intends to enforce some measure of control over the situation and given that he has controlled that entire family for years, I believe him.)
I agree and am mourning with you and all the other MJ fans.
Thank you Maria. Thank you!
Ok, amen sister. I mean, yea, and that too. Well said.
UGH! Thank you!! I am getting so frustrated with everyone fucking slagging him. He was NOT found guilty. And I get that maybe it makes people uncomfortable, but come ON. The man is dead. Let his family greive, and leave them be.
I agree with you, he had a horrible upbringing, and I do really think he was trying to recreate some kind of innocence for himself, by making a new childhood. I just think our society misinterpreted him and a lot of his actions.
I think as a parent, if you truly believe someone touched your child, no amount of money would ever replace the justice of being found guilty in a court of law. Or maybe thats just some parents.
I completely agree with you. I think the only “inappropriate relationships” he had with children were because he had a bad childhood and identified and felt comfortable being around kids. I don’t believe that he would have had his kids for his whole life if the legal system gave one lick of truth to those stories. Thanks for posting this.
O.J. was also found not guilty in criminal court, but I believe he killed Nicole. I don’t know about Mr. Jackson but he admitted to giving wine to children and sleeping (I’ll go with the benefit of the doubt and I’ll say that maybe there was no sexual contact) with them. The priests who molested children in the Catholic church were often involved in youth ministry and were surrounded with the mysticism of the church, so I’m not buying the Neverland story I was raised Catholic. I also agree that the star struck parents who let their children stay at Neverland knowing they were going to sleep in the same bed as Jackson showed poor judgement especially after the priest story. I am the same age as Mr. Jackson (50) and lived through that time that he and his brothers started being played on the radio. I remember M-TV and Thriller and am a fan of his artistry. I agree he was a hard working showman and didn’t like to disappoint the fans so I understand the reaction of fans and the wish to memorialize him. I though won’t mourn him, I believe that he did some shady things with children. I also agree it was sad that his family never intervened and helped him with his drug habit that probably ended up killing him, so I guess I won’t feel sorry for his Dr’s if they are prosecuted. Sorry to agree to disagree with you on this post, I don’t comment often but love your Blog.
With as many children as Michael Jackson was around over the years, why only two charges?
How could any parent accept payment to let someone they really believed to be a child molester go free – free to molest other children?
He was innocent.
He was exploited for money.
I couldn’t agree more! I was totally turned off by him when he was arrested the second time. But since his death I have spent days/hours reading books and researching on the internet regarding his life and the details of the 2 court cases and feel he was innocent. Why did these boys continue to be eager to stay with him and spend time with him? Victims of pedophiles do not look forward to spending time with their offenders and these kids were more than eager to be around him. Also, the details regarding Jackson’s genitalia that were described by the accused were incorrect upon examination by authorities. The accuser stated Jackson was circumcised when in actually he was not. There was a taped conversation b/w the father, Jackson, and his attorney in which the father demands money when he first confronts Jackson about his suspicions. Why not Just go to the authorities? The father was in the midst of a custody battle and owed more than 70,000 in back child support.
This is just to say that I truly believe he is/was innocent and I hope the accusers are feeling the intense guilt of ruining a good man’s life for money.
RIP Michael!
I have been banned from responded to people’s comments on here, but I couldn’t let this one go (I guess you’ll have to delete me, M. sorry.). I just want to clarify facts: it is NOT a fact that victims of child abuse (sexual or otherwise) are always or even usually averse to spending time with their abuser. That sounds logical to an adult, especially one who has not been abused, but it’s simply not fact. the FACT of the matter is that pedophiles are notoriously expert at endearing themselves to their victims and convincing them that they are not even victims at all. they most often choose victims who are already neglected or abused. the purpose for this is two fold: these children are more hungry for attention from an adult and they are less likely to be believed (by people like yourself, who think that their desire to hold on to the only person whom they believe cares about them, indicates that they are liars.). the psychological factors that expose and keep people (children and adults) in abusive relationships are not “logical”; a layperson may not be able to see the “reason” to a victim’s behavior, but that does not mean that the abuse did not occur.
Now, whether or not MJ was a pedophile is all merely a matter of speculation and that is all it will ever be. you are welcome to your opinion on the matter, as are we all. however, to include such statements as fact that perpetuate stereotypes that damage victims……..is deplorable. in your zeal to defend one man, your misinformation shames and silences other victims………and that is something I cannot abide by. I could go on about the topic until I bore you to tears, if I haven’t already. but I’ll just say that I can’t imagine that you are a person who seeks to harm victims of child abuse. that being said, please think about the things that you put out there and reinforce, because fallacies like that DO harm sexual abuse victims.
for more info on myths:
http://www.childvictimsvoicemaryland.org/Facts_and_Myths.html
http://www.forgetaboutdiets.com/trauma/sexualabusemythsandfacts.htm
and if you’re feeling like seeking a little more knowledge on this myth in particular, you could read some journals:
http://www.kidsindistress.org.au/files/The%20Child%20Sexual%20Abuse%20Accomodation%20Syndrome.pdf
peace :)